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Contents

1. Introduction
2. Contact Visits
3. Recording Contact Visits
4. Shared Care - Helping Parents to Resume Responsibilities
5. Rehabilitation Package After Placement
6. Difficulties
7. The Importance of Sharing Information

1.Introduction

The Children Act imposes a duty on local authorities to promote contact between a child who is being Looked After and those connected with them. Sometimes this is voluntary and sometimes there is a Court Order.

The main points (Depending on the plan for the child, the purpose and nature of contact will vary. Carer's are encouraged to ask the child's Social Worker to explain why a particular pattern of contact is being followed.) This will be recorded as part of the Care Plan.

1. You are looking after children on behalf of others;
2. Recognise that children's parents, relatives, friends, carers and Social Workers have different needs and attitudes to contact;
3. Your skill, attitude and experience, patience and understanding are a powerful influence on the successful outcome of contact;
4. Take your own family's needs into account;
5. Never leave things to chance;
6. You should expect help. Do not hesitate to talk to your Supervising Social Worker.

2. Contact Visits

Contact is one of the most emotional aspects of childcare - arranging for children and their families from whom they are separated to keep in touch with one another. The management of contact is one of the toughest aspects of fostering. If a child is to go home, their links with their Parents must be continued.

For young children where the plan is to return home, visits may be intensive and frequent.

For older children, and where the plan is not rehabilitation visits may be less frequent.

Visits should be natural and active occasions - going out, playing, etc. Contact also includes non face to face communication e.g. letters or phone calls.

A good contact visit should leave the child feeling reassured that they are loved and missed by their parents and still belong to them. They will have heard about what has been going on in their family in detail and the bonds will be kept alive. If a decision is made that rehabilitation of a younger child is not in the child's interest, we will try to safeguard their future with a permanent substitute family. Children need a family to which they can belong permanently. This may mean terminating the parents' contact to the child. Even if this is the case the child still needs to know about their parents and carers will need to help them understand this. If carers understand the parents' situation, it is easier for carers to explain kindly and truthfully to the child.

3. Recording Contact Visits

Carers should record the salient points in writing about contact visits to share with the child's Social Worker and the Supervising Social Worker, and bear in mind that carers records may be used in future Court proceedings. Carers should feel free to consult their Supervising Social Worker if they have queries about recording contact visits or sessions. They can also provide carers with a copy of the helpful Fostering Network booklet on recording for Carers.

4. Shared Care - Helping Parents to Resume Responsibilities

Straightforward contact can be seen, in some cases, as the first stage towards the child's return home. If it proves unsuccessful and parents, through this and in other ways, continue to show an inability or unwillingness to care for their child, then it is likely that the child will need to be cared for longer-term, perhaps permanently. In these circumstances continued contact may be unlikely or at least reduced.

However, if contact proves successful, then a move towards the child's return home might require a period of 'shared care' between carers you and the child's parents. Carers may also be asked to offer 'shared care' to children and their parents at the beginning of the placement, especially where the child is very young and perhaps parents need help and guidance in caring for their child.

The foster carer in this role may have several tasks: of observing, teaching, listening and then making assessments about the parent's potential ability to cope alone.

From this it is obvious that shared care is a very difficult task and requires special skills and tolerance - caring for someone else's child is difficult enough but doing this alongside their parents makes it even harder.

Decisions about parents sharing in the day-to-day care of their child will always be part of an agreed plan; made between carers, the parents and the child's Social Worker, at the outset of a placement.

The carers task is to be open to the notion of sharing the care, even when they may not agree with it in certain instances. Carers may also have to tolerate parenting which is different to theirs. Carers observations of parent's interactions with their child must take account of the fact that 'different' methods may not necessarily equal 'bad' methods. Finally, carers judgements of parent's abilities needs to be based on the notion of 'good enough parenting': that is, whilst there are some fundamental principles of 'good' parenting there can be no one set of hard and fast rules.

5. Rehabilitation Package After Placement

If good relationships between carers and the parents have developed during the time their child was placed with them, it is possible that carers may be asked to continue to help the family when the child is returned home.

This help may take several forms, for example:

• Visiting the family home on a regular basis for a defined period;
• Caring for the child for some parts of the day or at times of particular stress;
• Opening the foster carers home to parents and child to hear about the good and bad aspects of the family being reunited.

These sorts of continuing relationships often occur informally anyway but formal agreement to it, in some situations, could speed up the child's return Home and help ensure its success.

6. Difficulties

Parents may:

• Criticise carers;
• Criticise the care they give;
• Undermine carers especially by referring to the fact that they get paid;
• Make false promises;
• Try to give up visiting because it is painful;
• Show love by buying presents;
• Be unable to play their natural roles in someone else's house;
• Be over sensitive and take carers comments as criticism.

Remember:

• Understand their situation;
• Help them to see that you understand;
• Encourage them to remain involved.

If parents turn up unexpectedly and demand to remove their child:

1. Stay calm - don't use physical restraint;
2. Try to persuade them to speak to the child's Social Worker;
3. Contact the department;
4. If necessary phone the police;
5. Don't put yourself at risk.

If a child has been out with their parents and does not return, notify the department, EDT or the out of hours fostering phone immediately.

The Child

• Many children see their parents as who they want them to be - not what they are;
• Visits may reawaken a sense of loss;
• Visits may cause over excitement and exhaustion;
• They may openly reject carers and cling to their parents;
• They may blame the parents and reject them because they are hurt;
• Visits may lead to challenging behaviour, sadness, temper tantrums, anxiety.

Remember:

• Be sensitive;
• Try to understand what the behaviour is trying to tell you;
• Don't try to pick the pieces up alone.

Foster Carer

• You may feel apprehensive;
• you may be concerned you come from different backgrounds with different values;
• you may find it difficult to be yourself and relax;
• you might find it hard not to criticise and be angry and keep your feelings to yourself;
• you may find discipline difficult when parents are around.

Remember:

• The child in care is still the parents' child;
• Carers are a responsible and professional adult in a very sensitive situation;
• Be sensitive towards the parents and the child's feelings;
• Be aware of your own feelings;
• Don't contradict the parents in front of the child - involve them;
• The child needs carers to accept their parents because they are part of them;
• Let your own negative feelings out safely and away from the child using your supervising social worker;
• Talk to your Supervising Social Worker. Carers are not alone in picking up the pieces after difficult visits.

A child's parents will always be important to them. They may want to talk to you about them and clarify their feelings. Be honest and truthful and gentle - they may feel loyalty to them even if they are angry.

Working with the child, family and friends Good Practice Arrangements for contact visits will be made at the placement agreement meeting at the start of the placement. Make sure the arrangements suit everybody. There will be practical implications and carers will need to minimise disruption and intrusion to other members of their family.

Everything needs to be written down so that all involved are clear about what has been agreed.

If a child is at risk of harm and the parent unpredictable or aggressive contact may take place on neutral ground and would be supervised.

7. The Importance of Sharing Information

Where Carers look after a child where race, religion, culture or language is not their own, the Parents and families have invaluable information that can help the child maintain and develop important parts of their life.

Disabled children particularly need their Parents and Carer to share information so that their needs can be met.

End